we love star trek

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

In no particular order, here are the Top 40 Reasons Why We Love Star Trek:

1. Phasers. They shoot, they score! And they can heat rocks.

2. Tricorders. Because they can detect anything a plot requires.

3. The transporter. For when you want to get away.

4. The original U.S.S. Enterprise NCC-1701. (No bloody A, B, C, D, E or NX!)

5. Triskelion. Because humans are just damned good entertainment value.

6. Trelane. Auditions for the role of Q start here.

7. Hyposprays. Much better than hypersprays.

8. Kirk. Because he can beat up any captain in Starfleet. And most aliens. Don’t leave home without him.

9. Spock. Because he defies logic.

10. McCoy. Immortal lines for an immortal character. Alas, he’s dead Jim.

11. Uhura. The real lady in red.

12. Chekov. Because Khan remembered him.

13. Sulu. Because of his half-naked sword time.

14. Scotty. He is smart. He makes things go.

15. Captain Pike. Still rockin’ it on Talos IV.

16. The Talosians. It seems it all went to their heads.

17. All those beautiful guest stars. In soft focus, of course.

18. The Passion of the Kirk. Inspiration through the ages.

19. Those short, short skirts. Those skimpy outfits! When will designers incorporate these fashions for real?

20. Mudd’s women. A great threesome.

21. Klingons. They weren’t really bad, just written that way.

22. Romulans. Sometimes a straight bowl cut says it all.

23. Tranya. Because things go better with it.

24. Balok. You know, the one that gave you nightmares.

25. The Gorn. Once again, Kirk was smarter. But then again, the Gorn was reptilian. Probably too hot for him out there at Vasquez Rocks.

26. Kirk vs. Computers. The original computer hacker.

27. Edith Keeler.The Sergeant Sarah Brown of Star Trek. (If they ever do a Star Trek musical.)

28. Tribbles. Because they taste like chicken.

29. Fizzbin. A perfect game for any day. Except Tuesdays.

30. Redjac. What you get when you mix Jack Daniels and Redrum.

31. Gary Seven’s “exceiver.” We don’t know what it does, but we hear it’s now available in Japan.

32. The Wild Wild West. No, not the other ’60s TV show. We’re talkin’ the fake West, with the OK Corral and Chekov gettin’ all shot up.

33. Spock’s goatee. You have to ask?

34. The Mugato. Because it’s fun to pronounce.

35. Dr. M’Benga slapping Spock. Let’s face it, haven’t we all wanted to at some point?

36. Kirk’s stunt double. Because of the uh, close resemblance.

37. Spock with a heater. ‘Nuff said.

38. Tongo Rad. To this day, the coolest character name ever devised for a TV show.

39. Hippie Jam. Who knew Spock could have played with the Grateful Dead?

40. Spock’s Brain. Best episode ever? O.K. Chief, would you believe worst episode ever?

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